Just Whatever...

Just whatever....

Sunday, September 21, 2008 at 11:53am
Okay so i woke up this morning and i was like WHAT THE HELL????? pretty random, but i flipped around in my bed for a while, i looked at my wall which is full of flowers and cards and pictures.... Yes some were of boys some of girls... flowers from exes flowers from family and friends cards from past loves and family..... Then i stared and stared..... and i started too think... WHAT THE HELL.... what the hell meaning what is this life????? Are we soooooooooooooooo intoxicated by songs that sing too us that YOUVE BECOME MY ADDICTION??????? its all because of you.... or songs that sing if i cant have you i dont want no body baby...... or kiss me like youll never see me again... are we living out the lyrics to these songs, are we REALLY IN LOVE???? or infatuated or just in love with the IDEA or image of love.....I think maybe we are so clouded by sngs ESPECIALY HINDI!!!!! that tell us that when my hand is in yours the entire world is in my hand!!!!! or my entire life is of belonging too you with out you im breathless.... NOW seriously how many pl out there SERIOUSLY guys are actually BREATHLESS!!!!! are you? then mr or miss breathless how is it that you can wake up and go on in your life? go dancing? drinking.... laugh....... dress up nicely? socialize... and then the best part of it all...... meet someone new? isnt it true that if i cant have you in my life i am lifeless.....Hmmmmmm now whats wrong here? Is it just the song that was breathless...... or was your breath taken away by ONLY the song????? I mean dont get me wrong there were hundreds of times in my life that ive heard songs and thought IT WAS THE END FOR ME!!!!!! Love..... what have we made of it....A JOKE!!!!! a mockery..... an act of adulltry..... weve defamed all the great loves from before our time.... weve given it a name of shame...weve shared it after drinking all of the night away.... weve shared it out of greed...anger... jelousy....weve shared it out of stupidity....competition.... weve shared it after spending a night with friends shaking our butts and meeting eyes and saying hey baby want a drink.... yeah... lets have shooters .... oh im so drunk lets go SHARE LOVE!!!! lol.... wow im so impressed by PYAR love....haa ha haaa..... Love.....I love you ill die for you.... i swear....Oh ummmm i love you ill die for you2 months later.....New boy new girl... I LOVE YOU I SWEAR ILL DIE FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!! what the hell?????So is it just songs that hype us about love! or have we totaly de famed it destroyed it.... I think we have...... So after i looked at the pictures on my wall... I asked... did this person even love me or love the idea of loving me.... the fact that it wasnt allowed... that fact that our relationship may have reflected a past love story... of what was never allowed but would be FOUGHT FOR!!!!... hmmmmm... would have he really? would he pull out his sword and fight the world for me? would we walk through the deserts with only our love to feed us and quennch our thirst.... would we travel to different villages hiding our relationship and meet lovely ppl that would feed us whiskey too celebrate and then start dancing and singing....hmmmmmm Love or just a song, you tell me......Closing note,I swear im not sure if love is true anymore or ive lived it only through songs....and are trying too bring that fantasy too life.... Because if you look at the acts of love nowdays it seems like a HUGE joke too me....its about money, beauty, fame.... caste.....alcohol.....status.....conveniance....fun.....cheatng ,,,,lying....betrayal....false feelings....I guess a beautiful girl has stolen away my heart with one glance nowadays means i was hammerd at a bar i saw a slutty buzzed girl and i was horny so we hooked up LOL..... wowAnd without your vision i am blind too the entire world means.... i met this guy and i couldnt control myself so i slept with him, i didnt see your image i was blinded too you... but i saw him?????Okay thats it... so WHAT THE HELL.... means WHAT THE HELL....I guess we look at past lovers and say wow...were sooooo lucky too be in this year not the one they were in, because now we have so much freedom in love, So we say were so lucky and they were so unlucky for what they had too go through, but you know what, i think if the past lovers were looking down on us they would say... WOW what is wrong with these ppl, havent we tought them anything about love??? the truth of love the meaning? the actions.... we have sacrificed our lives for the name of love and these NEW AGE ppl cant even sacrifice a second??? we thought WE were unlucky but i think these new ppl are the unlucky ones becasue they never will understand the TRUE meaning of love! and what its made of...... In my heart i believe that weve taken the most imortant thing in this world in our lives and made it the last thing that matters too us... weve replaced it with so many other things that have no meaning in life, only for a moment.... we take being educated being popular rich... pretty.... being like someone else and losing ourselves just too fit in... we take all the other sins of life and put that before love....I honestly bow down to those that kept the value of love greater than anything... may it be the love for family, or friends or religion... I honestly bow down too you, not cutting your hair, for the love of soemthing, not showing your face for the love of soemthing, not eating for a month for the love of something, not eating pork...beef....meat... for the love of something, waking up at 5 or 4 am too do prayers for the love of something, giving up popularity, looks...style for the love of something.....wearing garments for the love of something......volunteering over seas for the love of something! Just love.... anyone thats okay stupid as this may sound KEPT IT REAL......its so hard nowdays too say something to someone and have them believe you...... because love i think doesnt exist anymore... or is very hidden......I truly wish i could go back in time and live in a time when things were more simple...because then the lyrics from a song today would be the words from someone who truly loved me....